This isn’t dangerous. Wrestling lions is dangerous. Climbing mountains is dangerous.
This is a walk in the park.
You can stand there and scream, loading a thousand YouTube videos, a thousand screenshots of undereducated idiots throwing around barbells and calling it CrossFit. It doesn’t make you right. It makes you a YouTube-watching naysayer.
What you’re lacking is honest proof. Statistics. A spreadsheet, a number, a definitive outcome, an analysis of variance showing that what we’re doing carries an outsized risk of injury.
Frailty, immobility, and disease are the result of refusing to stand, of allowing fear to dictate the bounds of fitness.
Of course, you’ll never find it, because it doesn’t exist. Instead, you’ll type hate mail on the nearest message board, insisting that thrusters break wrists and burpees break backs, that the clean and jerk is an abomination, the kipping pull-up an affront to humanity.
Good luck. While you hold forth from the mountaintops, we’ll be pressing on, recognizing a singular truth that has escaped your narrow worldview: risk and reward go hand-in-hand.
If you want the world’s safest fitness program, you’ll have to forego fitness. You’ll strap into a lever-controlled, pulley-modulated padded seat, moving through a predetermined range of motion, and you’ll stay fat. If you want to get fit, you’ll have to stand up, and the second you do, you’ll be subject to gravity.